Back, but not yet Back, if you know what I mean
Jun. 17th, 2025 02:33 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
I am still hoping to do a recap of our last day at Bearskin (a moose! for real!) and the trip back (so many state parks!) but I am still recovering.
For whatever reason, coming back is hard this time. Like, really hard. I don't know if it's the gloomy weather we've been having in the Twin Cities or the genearl political climate or what, but I'm just not feeling great. I'm feeling especially unloved at this very moment because I looked through a list of "professional attendees" for WorldCON and did not see my name.
Like, part of me is as hurt and surprised as not...
I've kind of been waiting for this day?
Like, there comes a time when a person just isn't relevant anymore. No matter if you've just published a book a few years ago. Or you're working your ass off so people know you're in the Pride StoryBundle and podcasting like mad. That stop stops mattering. You become noise. The noise of a thousand wannabes and hasbeens. You drop so completely out of the consciousness of the modern reader that it's like you never existed.
Not being recognized as an attending professional at the Seattle WorldCON really feels like one of these watershed moments. I can see the abyss below me.
I wish I understood why some people are never swallowed by it and other are. I have written and professionally published over a dozen books. Yet there are people who wrote ONE book whose names will live in the annals of history forever.
Whelp. I've asked Seattle WorldCON to please consider me an attending professional, but at this point my guess is that, if they do add me, it will be as Lydia Morehouse.
Edited to add: I am there now! They either added me quickly or it was hidden?
Edited Addtion: There is an interesting discussion going on right now on the SFWA page about the virtual end of Seattle. As I have said here many times, I'm a big fan of virtual cons. They're great for people who can't travel.
For whatever reason, coming back is hard this time. Like, really hard. I don't know if it's the gloomy weather we've been having in the Twin Cities or the genearl political climate or what, but I'm just not feeling great. I'm feeling especially unloved at this very moment because I looked through a list of "professional attendees" for WorldCON and did not see my name.
Like, part of me is as hurt and surprised as not...
I've kind of been waiting for this day?
Like, there comes a time when a person just isn't relevant anymore. No matter if you've just published a book a few years ago. Or you're working your ass off so people know you're in the Pride StoryBundle and podcasting like mad. That stop stops mattering. You become noise. The noise of a thousand wannabes and hasbeens. You drop so completely out of the consciousness of the modern reader that it's like you never existed.
Not being recognized as an attending professional at the Seattle WorldCON really feels like one of these watershed moments. I can see the abyss below me.
I wish I understood why some people are never swallowed by it and other are. I have written and professionally published over a dozen books. Yet there are people who wrote ONE book whose names will live in the annals of history forever.
Whelp. I've asked Seattle WorldCON to please consider me an attending professional, but at this point my guess is that, if they do add me, it will be as Lydia Morehouse.
Edited to add: I am there now! They either added me quickly or it was hidden?
Edited Addtion: There is an interesting discussion going on right now on the SFWA page about the virtual end of Seattle. As I have said here many times, I'm a big fan of virtual cons. They're great for people who can't travel.